Gastroparesis, hemiplegia, Spastic Hemiplegia, Tubie


Earlier this week I swept the floor, hung a bulletin board on the wall of our house which sits almost two months later in a state of not feeling moved in yet, and I folded a load of laundry I had mananged to dump from the dryer into a heap on the couch three days prior. I stalked the clock until nap time, when I gladly collapsed into a heap in my bedroom once the house was quiet. And I wept. A silent pouring relief of tears plopped dark circles on my pillow and I cried of happiness. Tears because I was so grateful to have been able to do those three things for the first time in…. I don’t know. I realized in those moments that I have been so overwhelmed in the grief of losing myself and my normal, that I have forgotten to be so deeply thankful for the triumphs like these. I know by that evening I was scowling at myself again, because it is ever so easy to compare myself to the old me and measure myself by the things I used to be able to do, and it’s a painfully distant gap. I want to remember these moments of victory though. I want to learn to give myself grace and to be quick to gratefulness even over the wins that seem so small. It is the repeated small victories that give me the motivation to keep pressing on and leaning in; how unfortunate for them to be overlooked. Sweeping, hanging, folding… so small, but still proof of something mighty. What small victories are you celebrating today?



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